As Westerners, you won’t like this. But if you are taken on and cared for by a real lama in an authentic fashion, they will mind your business. They won’t just leave you to your own devices. They will pull you up on even what might be considered small things, the way you eat, the way you talk, the way you walk, etc. This might be because there are genuine issues with the way you conduct yourself at these times, but the Lama might also be stretching you, making you more resilient.
You Westerners are all about freedom and independence. You are terrified of someone having sway over you. But to lose your freedom to an authentic lama could be the best thing that could happen to you. What is an authentic lama? An authentic lama is learned, wise and compassionate. There are no downsides to falling under the direction of such a person. Through their learning and wisdom they will know what will be of benefit to you. And through their compassion they will be willing to work hard to bring this about.
To put yourself in the hands of a lama who is lacking in these qualities, or only has one side of them, would be a recipe for disaster. When both sets of qualities are complete and from our side there is trust and diligence, there is not much that can go wrong.