A Brave Face & Brand New Shirt

If I had a girlfriend that left me, the last thing I’d do is shut myself off from the world. Well, maybe I’d allow myself to sulk for a little while, an afternoon or an evening. But I wouldn’t leave it long before putting a brave face on it.

I’d go to the barber, get a haircut, buy a new shirt and hit the town with a smile on my face and spring in my step. However we look at it, I think this is the best approach. Even if we sometimes have a little cry on the sly, we cannot let the situation and our feelings get the better of us. We must gee ourselves up.

If you want your ex to come back to you, if they hear or see that you haven’t left the house in weeks and have been wallowing in self-pity, is he or she likely to think, ‘I shouldn’t have left them. I’ve always wanted to be with someone who cannot leave the house and has a tendency to mope about feeling sorry for themselves’? No.

If you are worried about being alone, how likely is it that your dream partner is gonna just walk through the door and be smitten at the sight of you slumped on the sofa in your pyjamas?

No, the ‘Plenty of Fish in the Sea’ mentality is the only way to go. Shutting ourselves off from the world is rarely helpful, in any situation. To face the world with confidence and a ‘can do’ attitude is much more likely to bring us what we want in life.

Many of the Buddhist teachings that we have been looking at are for very advanced beings. So I thought I’d give some practical, worldly advice.

You’d imagine that lamas or monks would lack experience in this sort of thing, but you’d be shocked at how often people come to us for advice about their relationships and how openly they talk to us about such things.

Advice given by Drupon Khen Rinpoche in 2018 at Kagyu Samye Ling, Scotland, UK